Popular singer Temilade Openiyi has spoken about her experience in a toxic relationship, saying her former partner was obsessive and possessive.
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In an interview with media personality Angie Martinez, the “Essence” singer explained that she once mistook controlling behaviour for love.
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According to Tems, she later realised that the relationship was based more on ownership than genuine care.
“I have experienced love where I thought it was love but it was more like when someone is trying to own you,” she said. “They think that they own you. And that’s not love.”
The singer stressed that she believes a healthy relationship should be based on partnership and mutual respect rather than obsession or control.
“Love is not obsession. And it is not possession,” she said. “I can’t own another human being.”
Tems added that toxic relationships can be emotionally exhausting, especially because the person involved may not even realise that their behaviour is harmful.
She said many people confuse possessiveness with love, even though real love allows both people to remain individuals while supporting each other.
According to Tems, someone cannot truly love another person if they believe they have the right to control or “own” them.
