From Facebook romance to heartbreak: How I lost my first love

“I may have lost my first love, but I found something far more important—my worth” – Boluwatife Adedokun 

Love has a way of creeping into our lives when we least expect it. It starts with butterflies, whispered conversations, and hopeful dreams. But sometimes, it also comes with heartbreak, disappointment, and painful lessons. This is my story—a journey of first love, betrayal, and ultimately, self-discovery.

How It All Began

I had always believed that dating and schooling didn’t mix. My focus was on my education, and I had no interest in distractions. That was my belief, until 2018, when I met Deji.

We connected on Facebook while I was working as a salesgirl in Osogbo, waiting for my university admission. He had sent me a friend request, but I hadn’t paid much attention—until one afternoon, while scrolling through my Itel phone, I finally replied to his messages.

“Hi, my name is Deji. I live in Lagos, but I’m from Iree, Osun State. I’m done with my NCE and currently working as a teacher here.”

I smiled. “Wow! I’m also from Iree,” I replied.

Just as our conversation got interesting, my boss’s voice rang out: “Boluwatife, come and help me measure this rice!”

I dropped my phone and rushed to attend to her.

That night, I received a call from a strange number.

“Hello, this is Deji, the guy you chatted with this afternoon on Facebook.”

I sat up, shocked. “Wow! How did you get my number?”

“It was on your Facebook profile. I just wanted to check on you.”

That call changed everything. We started talking—about life, dreams, our hopes for the future. Then, one Sunday evening, he dropped the bombshell.

“I’ve realized you’re the type of lady I want. I’m in love with you already.”

I was stunned. Love? From someone I hadn’t even met? But he was persistent.

“I don’t have much, but I promise to take care of you with the little I have.”

I was skeptical. But as days passed, I found myself thinking about him. His words echoed in my mind. I told myself I wouldn’t fall for him, but I did.

A Love That Felt Real

We started chatting and calling every day. He became my confidant, my friend, my first love. He fell sick once, and I was so worried I lost my appetite. When he complained about airtime, I sent him some from my little salary.

Then, the moment I had been waiting for arrived. He traveled home.

When we met in person, my heart raced. He was tall, just as I had imagined, and had the same gentle charm I had fallen for over texts and calls. We spent time together, and before he left, he slipped a small ring onto my finger.

“It’s a promise ring. I love you so much. Please don’t remove it.”

I grinned, staring at my finger. Love had finally found me.

The Betrayal

Months passed. Then, one evening, I stumbled upon a Facebook post. A picture of Deji with another woman.

My heart sank. Who is she?

I called him immediately. He stammered through an explanation. “She’s my ex. My younger brother posted the picture by mistake.”

I wanted to believe him. But doubt crept in.

Then, things took a turn.

A mysterious lady messaged me on Facebook—the same woman from his post.

“So, you’re the one sending my boyfriend airtime? You’re using his picture as your DP? You ladies amaze me.”

My blood boiled.

“Oh, madam owner, well done o! Five years together, and you’re still forcing yourself on him? He’s moved on. Deal with it.”

Her response sent shivers down my spine.

“Five years? His parents know me. His brother knows me. You’re just there, wasting your time.”

I couldn’t breathe. My hands trembled as I typed back.

“You’re lying.”

But deep down, I knew she wasn’t.

I confronted Deji again. He swore he loved only me, that she was delusional.

Then, a pastor I met randomly told me: “Your boyfriend has another girlfriend.”

I brushed it off—until I couldn’t anymore.

I sent Deji a final message.

“Never call or text me again. I trusted you, and you deceived me. We’re done.” Then, I blocked him.

Letting Go

I mourned our love for weeks. I lost weight, cried myself to sleep, questioned everything.

But I let him go. I had loved him genuinely, deeply, fiercely. But love without trust is nothing. And so, I chose myself.

I may have lost my first love, but I found something far more important—my worth.

By Boluwatife Adedokun  – adedokunboluwatife4@gmail.com

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